Monday, January 08, 2007

an addition to the captain zigzag interlude

hello, little goslings. what is new in the neighbourhood? what is the 'haps'? are there 'haps'? i am just assuming. i feel like i haven't really talked to you in awhile. probably because i was busy blowing marc's mind, and not your own, with my saucy magma-filled volcano of a self.

note: thanks for claire for appropriate and inventive erruption sound-words.

you're lucky i'm back. the snappy guy who checked my luggage told me i could board my plane but i was late to check in (really? an hour previous is late?) and that i'd be pulled off the flight, most likely. well, i wasn't. he was dumb and spastic.

anyhow- if you don't read rhianna's blog, well a) you are one weaksauce little monkey and b) you should go read this entry which illuminates to you the situation of captain zigzag and ourselves.

bits rhianna missed because she was delighting in conversation with travis and not the crazy old sea-bag:

CZ: i have been working on my third eye lately
me: what like...with lasic surgery?
CZ: in yoga. i am learning from –
me: –do they take skin from your ankles or something?

-

CZ: my mother also read us Don Quixote
me: GAY
CZ: i am a windmill charger
me: maybe aim for totem poles instead.
CZ: ?
me: ugly native art. too verticle.
CZ: i like totem poles
me: you are not a reliable source of taste.

-

CZ: and then i go without food and shoes for weeks in the forest.
me: i bet your foot-bottoms are really unattractive.
CZ: (blah blah blah talking about some doctor who lifted up his foot and said "what healthy feet!")

-

and then of course he was describing to me this man he learned from- tried to convince me that NASA scientists had studied this miracle man, who started to sound more and more like a pony by way of references to his "gait" which was "like water flowing down a mountain". to which i commented "wait-he runs like water flows down a mountain? that doesn't sound healthy at all".

i chimed in with random inquiries about bears and ponies to no avail. my disapproval descended to saying "i am all about disapproval this year", various racist remarks, and squinting endlessly in skepticism and pure, unfiltered distaste for his chummy, spiritualistic drivel. and yeah. the eventual:

CZ: "I get it! You want me to stop talking and leave you alone! I'm sensing with my intuitive third eye that you wish I hadn't forgotten my keys! Well then. Au Revoir!"

Kaylen: ".....I hate you."


i bet he doesn't even have a boat.

also something rhianna sai:
cz: "this is my business card! it's green."
rhianna: "i've seen greener."

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