Tuesday, July 04, 2006

special guest

as promised, i will tell you (my gentle readers) about my special guest visitor.

you heard me right: despite my family and friends being far too detained/distracted to come out and see me, i am having a special guest visitor! i have never met him before which makes things quite exciting.

mystery=fun aplenty

it is a friend of alex's, whose girlfriend of 3.5yrs pulled a "we should see other people". when she actually meant,"i am seeing someone already". he walked in on her in one such a nasty situation. going back to my own similar experiences, i figured he could use a "get out of town" card to throw down at his whim. and what do you know, he is whims aplenty and will be in cow town around the 14th.

besides cleaning out the office room where i store my art material and paul stores his guitars and neat drums, i have dug up a list of really neat thing to do in calgary that do not involve cowboys. so without further distraction...

a list of really neat things to do in alberta that do not involve cowboys

1) Head-Smashed-In: this delightful place where there is a drastic drop in landscape. we're talking a perfectly perpendicular arena where crazy & inventive injuns used to chase buffalo off the edge of a cliff. the buffalo would plummet to their deaths and the bottom is absolutely swamped in buffalo skeletons. i hope i can bring back a buffalo skull. if you do not know as much, bison & buffalo are my favourite animals. virility, ahoy.

2) Lacome Corn Maze: self explanatory, i suppose. for the most part. not the part that consists of having to answer trivia questions to get yourself to the end. trivia = learning and it's fun to learn 'cause knowledge is power.

3) Glaciers : apparently there is a place you can go ride in a car with wheels as big as houses, over top of glaciers. this might be nice, if they are not planning to stick around very long. the glaciers i mean.

4) Shamballa: hippie festival rhianna, kathleen and i were planning to go to and laugh at hippies. i don't know about them, but i am definately packing a bottle or two of Fabreeze, and....does anyone have an AC/DC shirt i could borrow? i don't think modest mouse or decemberists would make much of an impact...

5) Mountains : the rockies. they are big.

a list of really neat things to do in calgary that do not involve cowboys

1) Snicker at Cowboys : just irresistable.

2) Zoo : which now features the elephant habitat construction site, covered in donated paintings from local schools. there is nothing funnier than paintings of exotic animals by chilren. ha ha ha. i'll bring a camera, give you pictures. you will enjoy them, i just know. also, the bike path outside my apartment, i think, leads to the zoo in some scenic route.

3) Series of Pubs/Bars : though other than ship & anchor, molly malones, broken city... i am not sure which ones. hi-fi might be interesting if anyone neat is playing. i am not taking anyone to cowboys this time of year. i do not like that place at all.

4) Bow River: playing in the river is fun. sure, it is fast and very cold... i think it may be illegal.

5) Festivals: folk fest- this would take care of five days, possibly. but neko case cancelled. i have already seen broken social scene. my enthusiasm has dropped to nada. global fest- funny ethnic bits. and i'm sure there are others that spring up.

6) Rooftop BBQ : my roof + company + etc.


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