Saturday, June 17, 2006

pineapples vs. mangoes

pineapples are undisputedly the best tasting fruit. in the universe. this is assuming that what you are tasting is a good pineapple and not a bad pineapple. good pineapples i could eat until my tastebuds are scorched away from the delicious pineapple acid. the same goes for mangoes, though.

now a great mango still doesn't measure up to a great pineapple. but let me tell you why i opt to buy mangoes instead. and in such bulk.

pineapples, simply by their size are much more of an investment. you put all of your eggs in one basket, so to speak. assuming eggs are 'delicious acids' and baskets..well i guess you do use baskets. or is the pineapple the basket... anyhow. they are huge, and not so inexpensive. it's very rare a person buys more than one pineapple unless they are:

a)going to a family reunion or
b)a living family reunion a.k.a. mormon

conclusion 1- you have one shot at a great pineapple for the same price as maybe half a dozen shots at a great mango.

now let's get into the actual liklihood of getting a great pineapple. you can sniff and pull out leaves all you want. but just because a pineapple is ripe, does not mean it is a great, tasty pineapple. it oculd be ripe but not as acidic, sweet, or tangy as The Ideal Pineapple. in fact, pineapples are kind of black and white. either you have a great pineapple or a disappointing pineapple. maybe i am wrong, but i've never found gray area when it comes to pineapples.

mangoes operate on some levels pineapples don't, flavour-wise. there are other aspects beside the balance of sweet/tangy/acid. sometimes there is a specific tartness. or a mild twinge of sourness. sometimes they just have facets of each flavour that the pineapple doesn't. this doesn't mean the pineapple has inferior flavour. at all. just less complex.

mangoes, because of their complicity, are more forgiving. there is a 'great' mango, somewhere at the top..a long spectrum of 'very tasty!' and 'good, but not impressive' before it hits 'disappointing'.

conclusion 2- you have a greater chance of enjoying a random mango than you do a random pineapple

if you do not enjoy your pineapple, you are sunk. unless you are mormon, etc, and have bought more than the one. chances are, you're just sunk. if you do happen to get a disappointing mango, well there are five other options. each more likely to be delicious on some level.

add up my two conclusions and it is pretty obvious. chances are if i get a sack of mangoes, i have a sack full of delicious mangoes. and i will enjoy them. on into the night. now, if i get a pineapple, chances are i have a disappointing pineapple and once i discover it is disappointing, i will maybe blend it into something where it will just serve as an intense citrus. not bad. but i have put all my eggs in one basket. and i have no other fruit to rely on. unless i get backup fruit and that seems kind of sad.

this is why i get sacks of mangoes.

also a little sidenote:
yes, there are apples. you can easily buy a dozen apples, just as you can a dozen mangoes. the former may also be lighter. but apples? are dull. very boring. unless you get granny smiths. and who would do that? they are horrible to have inn your mouth. unless they are baked into a pie. i like making pies but that is kind of difficult to manage every morning.


Blogger Jonathan Ball said...

this data ignores the simple fact that mangoes are a fuck of a lot better than pineapples. even though pineapples rule.

btw, if you want to see a REALLY "dark" song, go back to see my response to your "dark" poem on my blog.

6:14 PM  
Blogger echolalias said...

you know after writing this article i started thinking....maybe mangoes are better than pineapples.....

but this goes against everything i have ever thought to myself about pineapples.

10:28 PM  

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