the great & awesome pee list.

most of you know that if i were a boy, i would totally pee on just about anything. i thought i'd share with you the highlights. guys, you can borrow some ideas if you want as long as you tell me how great and awesome it was.

the highlights:

. parked convertibles
. dogs
. smart cars
. florence nightingale
. lululemon stores
. every year the art school i attended has a sidewalk art contest. i'd be saving it up for that.
. buffaloes
. lions
. great white sharks
. blue whale
. dolphins (they just seem like they deserve it.)
. anyone on my nixon-style enemy list
. the internet
. a bomb
. a ninja
. the tigris river
. piranhas
. teepees (childish i know, but it has 'pee' in it!)
. mary kay cars
. martin luther king jr. statue (not as a controversial act. just because peeing on things is my dream. i think he'd dig it.)
. lincoln memorial (same kinda reason. abe would give me a thumbs up, i just know.)
. any guy wearing an 'arcade fire' t-shirt
. the washington monument (again, not as a controversial/political act. just as a "neener neener, however phallic you are, you can't pee back")
. the pope-mobile (not with him in it. just the mobile)
. people who are peeing on things i want to pee on.
. ani difranco